The Proust Questionnaire
Here are the thirty-five questions Proust originally answered in 1890. And this is me in 2021 because I have a ton of work to do but I’d rather be doing this. The last time I did this, I was the same. So nothing’s changed fml.
- What is your idea of perfect happiness? Waking up early to drink French Press
- What is your greatest fear? Having the same fear year after year
- What is the trait you most deplore in yourself? How easy it is to not write
- What is the trait you most deplore in others? Putting energy to make others miserable
- Which living person do you most admire? Asha Kowtal
- What is your greatest extravagance? Making time to do things I love
- What is your current state of mind? Gas
- What do you consider the most overrated virtue? Punctuality
- On what occasion do you lie? All the time
- What do you most dislike about your appearance? My tooth gap but after I read Wife of Bathe, I don’t mind it so much
- Which living person do you most despise? Tejaswi Surya
- What is the quality you most like in a man? Laughter
- What is the quality you most like in a woman? Laughter
- Which words or phrases do you most overuse? “As the French say”
- What or who is the greatest love of your life? Detective Inspector Sarah Lund
- When and where were you happiest? Morning after great nights
- Which talent would you most like to have? Waking up early
- If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be? I wish I wasn’t in a hurry to respond to people
- What do you consider your greatest achievement? Moving on
- If you were to die and come back as a person or a thing, what would it be? The Banyan Tree at St. Joseph’s College, Bangalore
- Where would you most like to live? Bombay
- What is your most treasured possession? Capacity for small joys
- What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery? Squashing other people’s joys
- What is your favourite occupation? Plants vs Zombies
- What is your most marked characteristic? Cracking knuckles in my sleep
- What do you most value in your friends? Desire to drink
- Who are your favourite writers? Students
- Who is your hero of fiction? Alice Munro
- Which historical figure do you most identify with? Jackie Chan
- Who are your heroes in real life? Razia-Razzak
- What are your favourite names? Rumlolarum and Disco Shanti
- What is it that you most dislike? Having time but wasting it
- What is your greatest regret? That I didn’t put kai when I should have
- How would you like to die? In bed with a book on my chest
- What is your motto? Live quietly, drink tightly
This is Joan Didion answering the questionnaire when she was 69.